Critical Elements of Emotional Intelligence
Intellect and emotional intelligence are completely different things. Emotional intelligence is the cognitive ability to synthesize and analyze data; to problem-solve and make associations to create neuro-associations based on available information, facts and revalued centralized emotions centered with logic.
The latter is a set of innate and learned skills that facilitate relationships and enable a person to negotiate more easily through all areas of life.
Intellect can be measured by standardized IQ tests; there is no actual measure of the “EQ,” or Emotional Quotient. Even without a test, it’s obvious when someone has a high IQ and it is just as obvious when someone has a high EQ. The most notable evidence is when you under estimate the power of the subtle.
Rather than try to measure it, it’s more useful to look at the various elements that go into emotional intelligence.
While the IQ remains stable over a person’s lifetime, the EQ can and continues to be developed. Acquiring and practicing the following elements will enable you to boost your EQ. Some people are born with this gift and it is most powerful as long as they remain unaware of their emotional intelligence.
The first element of emotional intelligence is empathy is the ability to understand what other people are feeling will make you more sensitive and aware and will result in more meaningful relationships.
The second element is the recognition that your actions have rewards disguised in all reactions and responses. This understanding will enable you to make conscious choices in your life and to avoid unnecessary difficulties. An obstacle is what you see when you take your eye off of the outcome and make no mistake that an outcome is far more powerful than a goal.
Third on the list is good judgment. The gift of making well-thought-out decisions and seeing people for who they really are will maximize the possibilities of success in all areas of your life. It’s not what you see it’s what you don’t see that really counts.
Number four is personal responsibility, which really means the ability to respond. When you hold yourself accountable and own your own power; you are empowered to change things for the better. Other people respect you, because you own up to your part in your relationships.
The fifth element is insight. The ability to see yourself clearly and to understand your own blueprint allows for the possibility of personal growth. Once you understand your blueprint it offers insight into others and allows you to have a greater impact in your relationships.
Element number six is mental flexibility. Being able to change your mind or to see things from different points of view makes it possible for you to navigate all sorts of relationships and to succeed where other, more rigid thinkers would fail. Master your emotions once you to this you own leverage. Be clear in your outcome because your brain will act as a servomechanism to bring it to fruition.
The seventh element is compassion because being honest with oneself is the foundation of integrity. Always live with a kind and gentle attitude. Happiness doesn’t bring joy anymore than contentment brings about love. Joy can shine out of sadness as love can flourish even in pain, love is a decision you make in patience knowing the joy it will bring in it’s perfect work. Faith is courage that has said it’s prayers giving you the strength to walk the tiger.
This type of compassion facilitates personal transformation, while compassion toward others supports deeper, more loving connections.
The eighth element is integrity. Following through on commitments and keeping your promises creates much good will in personal and professional relationships and promotes success in both arenas. The most important human endeavor is the striving for morality in our actions. Our inner balance and even our very existence depend on it. Only morality in our actions can give beauty and dignity to our lives. If you don’t have integrity, you have nothing. You can’t buy it. You can have all the money in the world, if you are not a moral and ethical person you really have nothing.
Ninth on the list is impulse control. Thinking before speaking or acting gives you a chance to make deliberate, even sophisticated choices about how you present yourself to others. Not acting out of primitive impulses, urges or emotions avoids social embarrassment.
The tenth element is the ability to defer gratification. It’s one thing to want something but the ability to put off having it is empowering. Mastery of your needs allows you to prioritize around life goals. Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. Recognize that diligence is nothing more than keeping what you want in mind.
Number eleven on the list is perseverance. Sticking with something, especially when it’s challenging, allows you to see it through to completion and demonstrates to others that you are dependable and potentially a high achiever. Take one idea. Make that one idea your life. Think of it, dream of it, live on that idea and breathe life into it by anchoring it into your brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success, that is the way great spiritual giants are born.
The twelfth and final element is courage. Emotional courage (as opposed to the physical variety) is the ability to do the right thing, see the truth, open your heart and trust yourself and others enough to be vulnerable, even if all this is frightening. This causes others hold you in high regard.
Oops, did I say Final element? The thirteenth, last and most important element to the art of mastering emotional intelligence is spiritual intelligence because this simple component is they “secret key” because it creates synchronous processing of the whole brain and without it you are not utilizing the whole brain. When engaging spirituality you unlock the right brain of serial processing, the left brain of parallel processing and finally the synergy of synchronous processing giving you the edge to engage the polar shift. The shift from the object-pole to the subject-pole of attention replaces the ego with the soul. This polar shift establishes the state of presence and activates spiritual intelligence (SQ). When SQ is not active, IQ and EQ are exercised by the ego. But when SQ is active, IQ and EQ are exercised by the soul. This article is based on a synthesis of findings from different fields of scientific research, including cognitive psychology, psychoanalysis, transpersonal psychology, and neuroscience.
The soul is simply dismissed as non-existent by orthodox science, based on an unverifiable and unscientific belief that only material things exist. On the other hand, all religions agree on the soul’s existence. Nevertheless, religious beliefs situate the soul in a remote supernatural location, accessible to faith alone. But the SQ paradigm identifies the soul at a psychological location (at the subject-pole of attention), which is directly accessible to everyone in their own experience, without resort to religious faith. Spiritual intelligence therefore represents secular spirituality, based on the science of the soul.
Science of the Soul
Recent scientific evidence establishes that there is a verifiable state of conscious identity, distinct from the ego, associated with hemispheric synchronization and whole-brain activation . This distinct sense of self coincides with the experience of being feeling-awareness itself, in contrast to identifying with the body and mind . The native qualities of feeling-awareness itself are experienced at the subject-pole of attention in moments of presence, in the form of wisdom, compassion, integrity, joy, love, creativity, and peace . Thus the qualities traditionally ascribed to the soul have an accessible psychological location, associated with a distinct sense of self, with a detectable neurological signature . This combined evidence represents an integral scientific synthesis, as the basis of the science of the soul.
The evidence for spiritual intelligence from direct personal experience is corroborated by the findings of scientific research.
Integral Scientific Synthesis
The integral scientific synthesis, at the foundation of the SQ paradigm, combines findings from four independent fields of scientific research, as outlined below.
Studies in cognitive psychology have established the benefits of mindfulness training, with particular reference to anxiety and depression. These studies confirm that the state of presence can be identified neurologically, experienced repeatedly, and verified inter-subjectively. Consequently the distinct sense of self experienced in presence, associated with being feeling-awareness itself (or the soul), qualifies as a valid subject of scientific investigation .
Early studies in psychoanalysis demonstrated that object-relations are the means by which personal identity is established [6, 7]. This discovery was originally made a long time ago by ancient traditions of spiritual wisdom, notably by Vedanta and Buddhism [8, 9]. Nevertheless, in the western intellectual tradition, this finding was first confirmed by Freud, in his founding work on psychoanalysis, at the turn of the twentieth century. More recent psychoanalytic studies of object-relations confirm that the ego (or the body-mind-self) grows by means of identifying with states of body and mind at the object-pole of attention .
Findings in transpersonal psychology, as confirmed by countless meditators over thousands of years, verify that unmodified feeling-awareness itself, which is free from identification with objects of attention, experiences the qualities traditionally ascribed to the soul . The energy of unmodified feeling-awareness itself, which is known as spirit, is experienced at the subject-pole of attention in moments of presence, in the form of wisdom, compassion, integrity, joy, love, creativity, and peace. Spirit is the source of spiritual intelligence .
Neurological studies have established that the experience of presence is associated with hemispheric synchronization and whole-brain activation at a frequency of 40Hz . At this frequency part-brain functions from both hemispheres (PQ/IQ/EQ) are integrated into the field of the whole brain, thus combining mind, self, and world, into a meaningful whole. 40Hz whole-brain activation therefore correlates neurologically with spiritual intelligence. Neuroscience thus confirms that SQ is hard-wired in the human brain. However, SQ rarely occurs spontaneously. Therefore it’s necessary to activate SQ intentionally, in order to experience the benefits of spiritual intelligence in daily life . Watch the video below for a simple three-step method to activate your spiritual intelligence intentionally.
Spiritual intelligence represents the new paradigm of the third millennium.
The SQ paradigm represents a new synthesis, integrating psychology and spirituality, which clarifies how spiritual intelligence can be experienced directly, as an innate capability, without resort to religious faith. The evidence for spiritual intelligence from direct personal experience is corroborated by a broad range of scientific findings, as outlined above. The SQ paradigm thus authenticates secular spirituality in empirical terms, on an integral scientific foundation. Consequently, as explained in detail in this article, SQ supersedes the paradigms of the first and second millennium, represented by theism and materialism, and therefore represents the new paradigm of the third millennium.
All these elements combine within you to make up your emotional intelligence. With a high EQ, even a simple person is at an advantage in life. Without it, even someone with the most brilliant intellect is at a tremendous disadvantage.
I am just a girl, a child of God who realizes that I fall short of Gods grace everyday and I recognize that God gives it to me out of his amazing grace. I am blessed each day that I awake and choose to share it with al of God’s children… ~Lisa Christiansen
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